training in progress.

clocking base miles.

intensity intervals.

not much time left. full speed ahead!

i seem to be able to find solace in biking. no matter how tired i am, i just have that desire to go out and ride my lungs/heart/legs out. how bad the haze might be, i still press on.

it's something that i love doing. something that i have passion for. i might not be the best now, but i have a group of friends who are willing to pull me up. with them around, all my worries are gone. with the wind blowing against me, all my worries and sorrows just seem to fade away..

why is life so unfair? why is it so when you put in so much heart and soul into achieving something, but the outcome is still not what you hope for?

why does it always have to happen at this point of time? am i really not fated with the mats? 2years in a row.. both weren't in my control at all.. the fire still burns, but each time it gets douses with a pail of water. but how long more can this fire keep on burning in me? few more weeks? few more months? few more years? i wish to keep it burning for as long as possible, but with the pails of water pouring down, i find it harder and harder to keep the fire burning strongly..

i can start a new fire if the fire gets put out, but once the wood get in touch with water, it's hard to get it reignited again.. unless you throw it into a blazing flame..

a lonely saturday night, thoughts running wide.. things are not going smoothly at all.

i thought about my dreams.. i thought about my future.. i thought about my life.. so many setbacks in so many parts of my life.. is there really nothing in my life that i can do without encountering setbacks? even if i do put in effort, i still do encounter setbacks in 1 way or another.

why is this happening?!